Grumpiness, Post Manifestational Awareness, Weight and EFT Fix

Well, this has been quite the week for me. I woke up two Sundays ago in an incredibly grouchy mood. I didn’t know what my problem was, but I had zero tolerance for anything anyone was doing around me. If they breathed wrong, they got a grouch from me. It was quite disconcerting for me as I had a pretty good run of “connectedness” and had been in a good mood no matter what was going on for me.

Despite my grumpiness, we decided to take our GPS out and do a little GeoCaching nearby. As law of attraction would have it, the boys (5 and 7) where grumpy shortly after we entered the woods – it WAS hot and steamy out. On the way out of the woods, after finding the cache, I hit a hidden hole and basically kissed a tree. *rolleyes* Definitely in line with my mood. Luckily, due to working out, I didn’t end up seriously hurting myself against the tree. My arms HAVE gotten stronger, thank goodness, so I didn’t end up with splinters all over my face Unfortunately, my ankle didn’t fare so well. I limped out of the forest, but figured everything would sort itself out okay.

My ankle and my mood didn’t really improve for about a week. It sucked. I KNEW there was something at play in my vibration but didn’t know exactly what it was. It was VERY frustrating. I am usually really good at figuring out what I am focusing on that is causing my discomfort but this issue was evading me and the swollen, painful ankle and bad mood persisted.

One evening, I had a bit of a break through as I was reading my blog list. Tigerlily of Allowing A Perfect Body had recently made a post that REALLY resonated with me and when I was done reading her entry, I felt the bad mood evaporate for me. I realized what my problem was and why the bad mood had lasted for so long.

For all my life, I have been overweight. (And yes, I am working on this absolute statement thingy ) At this time in my life, I would like to lose about 40 more pounds in order to get where *I* would like to be. I want to be able to chase my kids and have lots of fun doing things outside with my family. I have lost about 10 pounds so far in about two months. I have been working out quite a bit with a personal trainer. I am, also, an emotional overeater. (Another belief that needs reworking) *I* can tell that my health and overall fitness has greatly improved. I think what has me tripped up is that I have been dreading the program weigh in that is looming because I know I have lost little weight from the last time. I have been dreading the sessions due to this issue. I feel that I have failed on some level and this is really disconcerting for me.

Wow, I just reread that last paragraph and my choice of words is very apropos. “Tripped up” is what happened when I sprained my ankle in the woods. I did that! The ‘pleasure’ of post manifestional awareness. Taking full responsibility for what happens in your life, both good and bad. Spraining my ankle gave me a “legitimate” out to not have to face my trainer until I could figure out what I wanted / needed to do *for me*. Through this, I have realized that I was trying to take an action journey instead of the emotional journey that was needed in order to get me to a better place.

CD 6/16/07 – Fort Collins, CO – Abraham-Hicks

Well we could make it more complicated than we need to by bringing deserving and worthiness and all of that into it, but let’s talk about it in the simple terms of whenever something happens and you are aware that you want more money and you feel that disappointed feeling within you, right then and there, that’s when you want to do the work. And the work isn’t “go get another job” and the work isn’t “spend less money”. The work is an emotional journey. The work is “find a way of feeling better”. And we said, just before you sat down here, when you make peace with where you are, you turn downstream. When you fuss about where you are, you always turn upstream. So, let’s say that you are struggling within your financial situation and you are feeling uncomfortable about it and you’re feeling especially uncomfortable about it because you know how to be a deliberate creator and are on many fronts. This is that one, as you said, last thing that isn’t happening and so you’re sort of exaggerating it’s importance. And you’ve gotta remember that money touches you in so many different ways that when you get an attitude about something, it’s like “this is the way I feel about it” so this is the vibration that I offer so this is the way the law of attraction responds to me so then I get more of it and this is the way I respond to it. So I observe it, I offer a vibration, I get more of it, I observe it, I offer a vibration, I get more of it. It’s sort of a cycle. But say to yourself “It’s natural that it’s going this way because law of attraction responds to the way I feel and this is the way I’ve been feeling. And then you could blame those people who taught you to feel that way, which is upstream. Sometimes blame feels better than guilt but none of them are very helpful. But you’re trying to make peace with it so you are just reaching for something that feels a little better. So you being to say something like:

Well, I’m understanding the stream relative to other things. In time, I will get it about this.

And meanwhile, I’m not doing so badly. In the scheme of things, things are moving along pretty well for me.

And I like the idea of things improving. And won’t it be fun to bring this one into alignment too.

And I certainly know I’ve lived enough contrast that I’ve put a lot over there in vibrational escrow. And, so, I know there is a lot calling through me.

And I have the sense that when I turn and go toward it, it’s gonna feel better.

And I can actually feel when I am going toward it and when I’m not. I can feel when I am more resistant. I can feel it. And I am making a stronger effort to turn and go toward it. I am feeling things softening up and I am so looking forward to consciously acknowledging that I am doing this work and then watching something break loose. And know that it broke loose or that it lighted up for me in a way that I could see it because of my soft effort at leaning that way.

And I like knowing it’s about vibrational alignment rather than about effort because I am applying as much effort as I wish to apply.

Hot Seater:
Absolutely and I am tired from it actually.

Abraham:
So, now, that may sound like an upstream statement, “I’m tired of making it about action, but I’m looking forward to making it about vibration.

And I believe this, I know this, I’m watching for the evidence of the improvement in the way I’m thinking about this.

The quote above is about money, but it could be about anything that isn’t working in your life. For me, it is weight. This issue is especially hard for me due to the fact that I have gotten the law of attraction working superbly in all other areas of my life EXCEPT this one last area. Once again, the failure feeling surfaces and throws a wrench in my well oiled LOA machine But, it’s all good. This contrast is helping me understand what I do want and helping me figure out where I need to go from here.

I have decided to put the personal trainer on hold for now and just work out at my own pace and when I feel inspired to. I also need to make that emotional journey, first, to make sure I am in the right place to make the inspired action that will get me to where I want to be. I know the balanced health, that I want, is just around the corner and that life will be what I want it to be. I now realize that the emotional journey is so important to get to where I want to be.

Today, I have had another, “EFT really does work” moment. Last night, I decided to tap on my emotional issues surrounding my emotional eating. I spent about 10 minutes at bed time, tapping on variously eating related issues. I had lots of sighs (which is a good sign ) and then went off to sleep. This morning, my ankle was just a little bit stiff with no swelling and, as the day wore on, I was amazed by the fact that there was just a tiny bit of pain when I rotate my foot. Yesterday, when I went to bed, my ankle was REALLY bothersome. Yesterday, going up and down the stairs and walking the dog around the yard was an issue for me. This morning it was just about “all better” It still amazes me that EFT works on the whole body, even when you aren’t thinking about specific areas! My ankle injury was vibrationally tied up with so many other things and the tapping helped loosen the grip that the emotional vibrations had.

Hmmm, I think there just may be something with this EFT stuff! And it might just be my key to taking the emotional journey that I need to in order to get to where I know I am going.

Perfect weight, here I come!