Archive for January, 2007

This parenting thing is really tough. I want to be able to easily convey what my kids need to hear in order to go with the flow and climb the emotional scale when needed. I am still getting the hang of it and find, at times, that I just am not sure what to say to help in a moment of crisis. I know what needs to be done in the long run, but in the immediate issue, I can have problems providing what would help.

I posted this to a couple of different place where Abe-ites hang out in hopes of gleaning some valuable insight. I am posting my post here and will add information as it becomes available because I KNOW I can’t be the only parent trying to muddle their way through getting Abraham down and also being concerned about not messing up their children’s internal guidance.

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Hi Everyone,

I am hoping that someone on the list will be able to help me figure out what I can do or say to help my daughter.

Jen is just about 10 and has always had a fear of sleeping over at friend’s houses. She was all psyched up for going to a sleep over birthday party at a friends house that she has been to many times. She knew about 1/2 the people who were going to be there. She has always seemed to be quite the homebody and doesn’t really like trying new things and places unless mom or dad is within view. As a little kid, that is okay, but she hasn’t really found a way to work through this need as she gets older and it is causing problems for her. She always seems to have the “what if I don’t do it the right way and look stupid and then will be embarrassed” current going through her.

Before she left, I did all I could to make sure she was set to go. We ripped her night time CD so she could listen to it on her ipod (she needs it as part of her night time routine). It was all going well until I said that if she decided she wanted to come home, she would have to call by 11pm because I would be going to sleep. I could tell at that time, that it caused her to start worrying. (She is my little worry wart child).

I dropped her off and she looked a little apprehensive but went right upstairs with the other party goers.

At around 10:10, I got a call from her saying that she wanted me to come pick her up. She was crying by the time we got to the car because she wanted to stay but she was afraid that she would change her mind after 11pm and then be upset and crying and would be embarrassed in front of all the people there. She is a major “what if” kid and always focuses on the major negative things that could happen. I have a hard time with that, because I don’t do that at all so I don’t know how to help her climb out of that.

When we got home, she was beyond upset. I offered several times to take her back (they wouldn’t have minded) but that just made her more upset. There were so many things going on in her, I didn’t know how to help. She was tired and really wanted to sleep, but they said that they were going to stay up all night long so that stressed her out. They hadn’t done all the stuff that they were going to do with the festivities so she was upset that she missed all that. She was really upset that she really wanted to stay but couldn’t get over that fear of staying. She was upset that she was going to miss the birthday breakfast. She was afraid that no one would ever invite her to another sleep over because they would think that she would never stay. All this tumbled out in about a 5 minute period. I tried my best to get her into bed because she really needed to sleep and re connect.

It was kind of funny. At one time, she decided that there was a particular “Ask and it is given” card that she liked so I let her take it to her room. It is the one that says “I will reach for the best-feeling thought I have access to” I pointed it out to her right before I left and she just sorta growled at me LOL (understandably so)

I was hoping that she would be in a better place this morning when she got up, but not so. The first thing she said to me was “I should have stayed” She has been moping around all morning or laying on the floor looking all depressed. She did start working up the emotional scale, but unfortunately, it was by picking a fight with her brother. I really don’t want the disharmony in my house so I sorta squashed that avenue of going up the ladder. I did tell her that I realized that she was just trying to feel better, but that there had to be better ways to go about it.

I don’t know the right words to say to her to help her. I know where she needs to go, but just not how to convey it to her in a way that isn’t mom shoving it down her throat. (She is currently a bit Abraham resistant LOL)

Now that you know the background, is there anything that you can suggest that I can say or do that will help her do what she needs to do in order to get to a better feeling place?

Thanks for your help!
Vickie

I have been a subscriber to the weekly CD for about a year and this week’s CD was absolutely amazing. There were so many things on this one that really spoke to me and made me feel like I really understood why my life is the way it is. It gave me hope and it is a wonderful feeling to know I am going in the right direction.

Thank you, Abraham, for hearing my rocket of desire for more clarity I am so appreciative of the fact that I am truly hearing the answers that you are providing.

The closing comments were SO WONDERFUL that I had to share them with you. This is SO what is all about
Enjoy!

CD 10/14/06 - Washington DC Track 8 (about the last 3 minutes of it)

And those who are watching you from the outside of you, which is everybody else, is saying things to you like “you just seem happier”. They’re saying things to you like “It seems to me that you get everything that you want” They begin saying to you things like “I don’t know what you’ve got going on, but you feel like a different person” and as you say to them, softly, the beginning of what you have heard here.

“I’ve come to understand that I am far more than I see here in this physical body but being in this physical body is the reason for my most expansion as a being. And I can feel the love that source has for me about that expansion. I can feel how much source loves my providing the avenue of their expansion. And one day it just occurred to me - I am a source of expansion for that which man calls God and I can feel that which man calls God, wants me in on it too. And so, I’m turning more and more, in the direction of things that make me feel good.

My new orientation is to praise, not criticize
My new orientation is to appreciate, not blame.
My new orientation is to love me, not doubt me.
My new orientation is to look for the benefit in you.
My new orientation is to look where ever I am for positive aspects.

My new orientation is today, no matter where I am, no matter what I am doing, and no matter who I am doing it with, to look for that which I am wanting to see. And I have come into alignment , you’ll tell your friend, with who I am and I gotta tell you, it’s sweet. It feels good.

It feels good and that’s the bottom line of it but the side benefits of it are:

I’m richer for it.
I’m healthier for it.
I’m clear minded for it.
I’m more flexible for it.
My relationships are better for it.
My world has come into alignment. I can feel that I have finally become who
life has caused me to be. ”

There is so much love for that which you are. We want you to know that you are the extension of that which we are and that we would not expand as we are if it were not for the likes of you. You will never be able to feel in this physical form the intensity of the appreciation that source feels for you. But you can get close if you get pointed down stream. And that is our wish for you. We will never stop calling you. We will never stop knowing you in that way and we will never, not one time ever, ever catch you in a lie see you in a flaw, because as far as we are concerned you are perfect beings in the state of eternal evolution. There is great love here for you and, for now, we are complete.

This is a cool video. How long do you spend focusing on what you want, really want??

Time for my daily running tally of the things I am grateful for today

I appreciate that I can open my window in the office and hear the birds twittering away in the trees and feel the cool breeze coming in.

I LOVE living here where I can open my windows in the middle of January and appreciate the wonderful weather.

I am grateful to be able to wake up to the doves outside my windows cooing away and hearing the crickets chirping away. I appreciate the sound that the wonderful wind chime we have makes and the wind gently blows past it.

I am grateful for the mysterious person who cleaned up the garbage from the bridge over the beautiful lake. Things are back to looking so beautiful there now

I am thankful for business bills. I actually like writing the checks and catching up with the accounting software. I love seeing how much money grows in there.

I grateful for my commute time to work. It gives me time to listen to my weekly Abraham CDs over and over again. Everytime I relisten to one, I always hear something new and exciting.