Archive for June, 2007

Looking through my visitor log, I saw visitors coming through from Lyman at Creatingabetterlife.net.

Seems that there is a meme started by Hilda at Living Out Loud about “Songs that make your heart sing” and Lyman was tagged and then he tagged me!

I had to smile when I saw what song he chose – Twisted Sister’s “We’re Not Gonna Take It”. I so remember that song. I think ALL teenagers in the 80’s will remember that song as what would amount to a teen angst anthem. What a great song to facilitate a move up the emotional scale I LOVE it!

The song that currently makes my heart SING (la la LAAAA!) is:

Lyrics from A-Z Lyrics Universe

Unwritten by Natasha Bedingfield

I am unwritten, can’t read my mind, I’m undefined
I’m just beginning, the pen’s in my hand, ending unplanned

Staring at the blank page before you
Open up the dirty window
Let the sun illuminate the words that you could not find

Reaching for something in the distance
So close you can almost taste it
Release your inhibitions
Feel the rain on your skin
No one else can feel it for you
Only you can let it in
No one else, no one else
Can speak the words on your lips
Drench yourself in words unspoken
Live your life with arms wide open
Today is where your book begins
The rest is still unwritten

Oh, oh, oh

I break tradition, sometimes my tries, are outside the lines
We’ve been conditioned to not make mistakes, but I can’t live that way

Staring at the blank page before you
Open up the dirty window
Let the sun illuminate the words that you could not find

Reaching for something in the distance
So close you can almost taste it
Release your inhibitions
Feel the rain on your skin
No one else can feel it for you
Only you can let it in
No one else, no one else
Can speak the words on your lips
Drench yourself in words unspoken
Live your life with arms wide open
Today is where your book begins

Feel the rain on your skin
No one else can feel it for you
Only you can let it in
No one else, no one else
Can speak the words on your lips
Drench yourself in words unspoken
Live your life with arms wide open
Today is where your book begins
The rest is still unwritten

Staring at the blank page before you
Open up the dirty window
Let the sun illuminate the words that you could not find

Reaching for something in the distance
So close you can almost taste it
Release your inhibitions
Feel the rain on your skin
No one else can feel it for you
Only you can let it in
No one else, no one else
Can speak the words on your lips
Drench yourself in words unspoken
Live your life with arms wide open
Today is where your book begins

Feel the rain on your skin
No one else can feel it for you
Only you can let it in
No one else, no one else
Can speak the words on your lips
Drench yourself in words unspoken
Live your life with arms wide open
Today is where your book begins
The rest is still unwritten
The rest is still unwritten
The rest is still unwritten

Oh, yeah, yeah

Sooo let’s see, who to tag, who to tag…

Belle at Belle Enchanted

Dean at Law of Attraction for Beginners

Clyde at Feeling Good

Barb at Feels Like Magic

Okay, ladies and gents, what song makes YOUR heart sing?

Depression.

What a deep dark word that can be. When a deep depression sets in, it affects everyone who interacts with the depressed person. For me, it is probably the biggest contrasting situation I have had to deal with in a very long time. It has rocked my world and my husband’s world dramatically. My kids bounce back relatively quickly from everything. The depression has affected them to a small extent, they seem to be happily bopping along with very little notice to what is going on around them.

When my husband’s depression got really bad in February, I sort of lost my connection with source due to how I was focusing on everything. I would let my focus go to more negative feelings and travel down the emotional scale to meet my husband in his depression. That really wasn’t a pretty picture because we both were going back and forth between depression and anger. Icky, icky, icky.

I have finally come to a place where I am truly appreciating the contrast of the situation. The depression, our declining relationship, and my choice of emotions have really helped me to focus on what I really want. It is so easy to focus on the negative of an unwanted situation. For every “not wanted” circumstance or object, there is a positive “what is wanted” circumstance or object. I have, over time, chosen to focus on “what is wanted” based on the contrast that I am experiencing. I shoot off those rockets of desire for better circumstances and focus on what I want coming back to me when I am able to come into alignment. It makes me feel so much more powerful in controlling my reality.

Your Rockets of Desire

All of your power is in the now, because all of your vibration is in the now. So when contrast gives birth to desire, bless that desire. Feel the power of the passion of that desire, because the Universe is hearing your rocket. And when you relax, the Universe will answer your rocket of desire. Esther saw a documentary where they were tapping into thunderstorms to find lightening bolts. They were sending a rocket up which was hooked with a wire to their equipment, and they wanted the lightening to strike the rocket because they were wanting to measure the current. And Esther said, “Abraham, is this like that rocket of desire that you are talking about?” And we said, “It is very much like that.” The contrast gives birth to your desire and then the Universe matches your rocket and brings it right back down to you. And so, as you are moving through the contrast of your physical experience, bless the contrast that gives you the desire. In that desire, you are summoning Life Force, and if you can learn to relax in the midst of that desire, more good than you have ever imagined will begin to flow into your experience. Feel the power and the freshness of your now: You decipher the contrast. You know what you don’t want. You send out your rocket of desire of what you do want, and now you stand in a fresh new place; you want in a fresh way that you have never wanted before. And that’s what life is. In that fresh wanting, you summon another dose of Energy. If you can begin to savor the mere fact that you have desire right now, and you would stop trying so hard to have that desire be fulfilled and manifested in some physical format, then you would have it.

Excerpted from the workshop in Boston, MA
on Sunday, October 11th, 1998
http://abraham-hicks.com/journal.php?eid=559

Back in May, I went to see Abraham-Hicks in Asheville. I focused my way right on into the hotseat to ask a question. The funny thing is that the question that I had formulated wasn’t really what was answered. My vibration was very much on my relationship with my depressed husband, and THAT is what I received guidance about. My interaction with Abraham did not make the Weekly or Monthly CD, so after much thought, I have decided to share our interaction here with you. I KNOW that what was said will be of immense value to many and that Abraham would be okay with the sharing of it.

There are 3 tracks which are about 5 minutes long a piece. The question actually starts a bit in on the first track.

Track 1
Track 2
Track 3

After my interaction with Abraham, I couldn’t remember much of what was said. I knew it FELT good but what was actually said totally escaped me. When my CDs from the workshop arrived, I was a little hesitant to listen to our interaction. I am not quite sure why that was, but, now, I am so glad I overcame that and listened to it. I was listening on the way home from work and by the end, I had tears of joy. That interaction raised my vibration about what is going on in my life immensely. Thank you Esther and Abraham. I can honestly say that our time together has changed my life for the better and I hold it very dear to me. We WILL meet and talk again. I am sure of it!

My husband is moving in the right direction. He does want to feel better and is doing what he needs to in order to get there. I am choosing to look for the good in it all. I choose to see in him that which I want and not focus on that which is unwanted. I choose to be that beacon for him and call him forward to better and better feeling places.

I know life is good and that this contrast will help form our better future together. These things I KNOW (now ). It took me a bit of travelling the emotional scale to get here but it was well worth the journey to me.

There has been some weirdness going on in our neighborhood as of late. Well, actually, it isn’t the whole neighborhood, but rather to one family in particular. My daughter happens to be friends with one of the girls in this family so she hears about all the not so nice things that seem to be happening.

I have come to realize that I am a witness to the law of attraction in action. The mom seems to have a very odd vibe around her. She seems to attract some not so pleasant things into her reality. For example, someone followed her home in a harassing manner and was bumping bumpers with her and then sped off when she got home. There are many other instances where what happened matched up with her apparent focus on the things in her life that she doesn’t like. I am fine with her path for the most part. The mama in me sometimes gets a little concerned though as my daughter is being exposed to all of this and, my opinion has always been, erroneously, that she was a bit of a gentle soul who would be frightened easily.

This past week, I came home to have my husband alert me to the fact that the neighbor had called to warn us of a peeping tom in the neighborhood who had scared her daughter at around 4:30 in the morning. She also wanted to tell us that we should be careful with our kids to keep them safe from this potential predator. It pissed me off. I did a bit of a rampage of not so niceness about the whole situation and then calmed myself down enough to sit down at the table with my children and explain what my feelings on the issue were.

Turns out, my daughter was aware of what was going on. She even told me that her friend across the street had supposedly seen this person in their yard as well. I was so proud of my daughter. She didn’t seem to be that rattled about the issue. I went on to explain that I wasn’t too concerned about it all. I asked my daughter if those types of bad things ever happened to us? She said no. I also pointed out that her friends family seems to have a heap of this type of bad luck. I explained that I believe that we get what we focus on. Her friend’s mom tends to focus on those sorts of things, and ends up getting what she is focusing on. My daughter readily agreed to that based on what she has heard and seen. I, on the other hand, believe that we are safe and that good things come our way based on what our point of focus is, and that is what happens. She seemed to understand and accept that reasoning.

Since that time, we have seen that family not allow their children to walk anywhere in the neighborhood. The family members drive them around to keep them safe. That is the right option for them, but not for us. Fear brings the things you fear. I choose to help my family focus on the fact that life is good and that only good things come our way. My daughter just finished a walk around the neighborhood with a friend unattended by an adult. They came home safe and sound, just as I knew they would and even more importantly, just as THEY knew they would.

As parents, we hope to help our children bloom and grow up strong and healthy. I am coming to realize that my children are teaching me so much more than I am teaching them if I leave them to do their thing without imposing what *I* think is best for them. Perhaps that is the lesson of love we need to learn, to let our children find their own way while we watch and learn. I love my life and my family. I so appreciate the wonderful interactions we have that help us all grow and learn.

The History

In my post EFT and the Emotional Scale, I said I would give a personal example on how I made Abraham’s Emotional Scale and EFT work for me, so here it is

It is a little complex, but, then again, aren’t all issues that seem to follow us around through the years? My mom and I had what amounted to a 3rd World War type of relationship for a good part of my life. Through the years, I came to realize that I did best when she was many states away (or even in a different country at one point) with very little contact. I could go merrily on my way, seemingly leaving the past where it belonged, in the past.

My life was bee bopping along nicely until my life took a bit of a tailspin. Depression hit my household in a big hard way and threw life, as I liked it and was accustomed to, totally off course. I found “mother issues” creeping out of the past and really messing around with me. The issues my husband and I were having mirrored the way I felt when I was growing up with my Mother. So instead of dealing with the immediate issue at hand, my husband’s depression, I was dealing with the rejection issues I had with my mom at the same time. The emotional meltdowns I was having, on and off, were for how I was feeling in the present, superimposed with how I felt when I was growing up. Pretty intense. These were “let me sit in a dark room and sob and sob” meltdowns. In the middle of the meltdowns, I would get really mad because I knew I was paddling upstream but didn’t know how to work through the issues in a fashion that get me to a better feeling place.

I knew about EFT and had just started “getting” the Emotional Scale. I had a feeling that the two could be used together to help me out. In the middle of one of the milder meltdowns, I decided to tackle my monster in the bushes. I figured if I could get at the childhood programming issues, and move those vibrations to a better place, my current situation would be a bit easier to deal with.

EFT and the Emotional Scale – The Process

The next time I had an intense interaction with my husband, I wiped away my tears and found a quiet place, and started tapping.

I had the Emotional Scale in mind as I worked through my issue.

At the time, my SUDS level (my perceived discomfort level) was probably a nine or ten. The way I did the EFT was a bit different than what is conventionally done. I took the emotional setpoint from the emotional scale and did a full round of tapping based on that emotion. I skipped the “I love and accept myself totally”.

Anger

I was really mad that my mom couldn’t / wouldn’t give me what I needed and deserved. Some of the phrases I tapped on were (minus the swear words that came out at the time ):

- Even though my mom really didn’t want me, I deserve to be wanted dammit!
- If she didn’t want me, she shouldn’t have #!$?#@ adopted me.
- I hate her for how she made me feel!

I then moved on up to blame because that was a logical progression and the angry stuff just didn’t feel right anymore.

Blame

- If she had tried harder, things would have been so much better!
- It’s all her fault that I was so screwed up for so long.

After that group, I was able to jump up the scale a bit to disappointment.

Disappointment

- I am really sad that things did not work out better.
- I wish we could have had a better relationship.

At this point, my vibration surrounding the issue had dramatically changed. I felt a lot calmer about everything that had happened in the past and what was happening in my present.

I went on and reached for another step up the scale. Boredom, Pessimism, Frustration/Irritation/Impatience and Overwhelment felt like a backwards step from where I had moved to so the next emotion I tapped on was Contentment.

Contentment

- You know, I am doing pretty well right now. Life is good most of the time.
- I am happy that Mom and I trade emails every once in a while.
- I am where I am, and that’s okay.

At that point, I stopped tapping because my discomfort over it all had gone WAY down.

The Wonderful Outcome

In the weeks that followed this tapping session, I found that I was looking at my husband’s depression in a different way. Our interactions seemed to be more OUR interactions instead of adding my mom into the mix. Definitely an improvement.

The big proof that things were different vibrationally around the issue of my mom occurred when I want shopping for the DREADED Mother’s Day Card. Every year, I spent an awful time in the card shop trying to find a card that wasn’t, what I considered to be, a blatant lie. As I would read though the sentiments, they would inevitably leave me on the verge of tears for what my mom and I *didn’t* have in the way of a relationship. It was my yearly stroll down the lane of where I really didn’t want to go.

This year was different though. I was able to look through the cards and, not a one, upset me at all. It was weird because I acknowledged that the card wasn’t a good one, but the negativity I had always had in the past that would leave me on the verge of tears, wasn’t there. It was a very surreal feeling to me. I found not one but three cards that I could send to her. She did the best she could, and so did I. It was time to let go of the past hurts, and, I’m telling ya, it felt damn good!